I awake in the morning to a note from Jonathan. He would be back in a couple hours "p.s Happy Valentines Day Cricket!!". I don't know what else to do but go home and get my gifts for him together. I wait two hours.. three...four. I'm becoming impatient. What kind of valentines day is this if I can't even spend it with the person I love? He hasn't responded to any of the texts I've sent from my mom's phone. Finally I cave and call him. "I'll be home soon OK? Bye." And he hangs up. What the hell! Wherever he was sounded busy. I'm starting to become irritated. I call him back "Where are you!?" I demand "Tell her I said to kick back" a girl's voice says, I'm pretty sure it belongs to Dominic's girlfriend. "Kick back woman!!" He says laughing and hangs up. I'm so mad I start to cry. Was I really that naive? Did I really think after all I had seen I was somehow the exception to the rule? That even though all his friends had multiple girls my man was going to remain faithful? I text him that it's over. He texts me back that I am ruining the surprise and to relax. Call me and say you love me I text him. He calls me but it's Dom's girlfriend "Relax Emily I have your back OK?" and she hangs up. I feel a little less queasy but not entirely so. Four more hours pass by. I am done. The whole day is gone, what could possibly take soo long? I text him not to bother with anything at all. He texts me to come over. I ignore it. He shows up at my door, I ignore it and tell my mom and step dad not to answer the door. Then I hear a loud bang. Even my hard of hearing mom and step-dad hear it, my mom yells for me to come downstairs. The front door is open and she's pointing outside. In our front yard is a cell phone box split open and half it's contents spilled out onto the lawn. I turn to leave it but see my mom start walking towards it so I go to pick it up instead. As I bend to pick up the pink phone Jonathan comes out from the side of our townhouse "Happy now bitch?" he says and walks towards his house. The next day we talk for hours, he has no explanation for where he was. All he can come up with is that he was at the mall with Dom and his girlfriend so they could help pick out a phone. Even if I include the promise ring and gift certificate he got me there's no reason why it took more than eight hours. I just couldn't accept that. There were too many holes in his story. He becomes angry that I am even questioning him and grabs me by my throat and throws me against the wall. "Why can't you love me?" he asks through tears, I can't get words around his grip. "Why? What have I done to you?" I claw at his hand. He lets go and I gasp for air. "I'm sorry. Just go." He collapses on his bed next to the Cowboys jacket and wallet I got him and I can see the gift bag and his shoulders shake from his sobs. I sit on his bed and stroke his head. He reaches up to grab my hand, I think he is going to hold it but he squeezes it, hard. He turns his head toward me "Get the fuck out or I'll have my mom do it for you." He says through gritted teeth. "You don't have to tell me twice." I say, holding back tears as I walk away.
*Originally written January 12th 2012
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